WASHINGTON -- The number of chronically homeless people declined by 15% last year, according to a first-of-its-kind government report released Tuesday, though officials cautioned that part of the decline may be attributable to better counting methods.
Yes! Let's make the homeless extinct like the dodo bird! And by that I mean club them all to death like Portuguese sailors did to the dodo birds in the late 1600's.
Nationwide, almost 1.6 million people were homeless and found shelter last year, the report found.
Ugh, this means that the ones that didn't go into shelters weren't counted...which means that there are more filthy bums out there, undocumented like illegal immigrants! :(
The report defines a chronically homeless person as a disabled individual who has been continuously homeless for at least a year or has been homeless at least four times in the previous three years.
Hmmm does this mean that chronic homeless people aren't counted if the only thing that's disabled with them is there willingness to work? Let's hope not, because that would mean that there's WAAAAAAAAY more homeless people out there.
Advocates for the homeless warn that counting the population poses challenges. For instance, homeless individuals may not want to be found.
That's right, some homeless have secret lairs and don't want to be disturbed. See the articles on the bridge dwelling troll bums for some good examples:
Bridge dwelling troll bum creates giant rat's nest underneath LA bridge
Tales of the Homeless - "Man found living comfortably inside Chicago drawbridge"
Even the new data systems -- called "homeless management information systems"-- can't account for those who don't want to be counted. They track only those who use shelters, though officials think that, over the course of a year, most homeless people -- even those who largely "go it alone" -- will need such services.
By golly if we have to insert GPS tracking devices into the homeless so that we can monitor there whereabouts, then so be it. I'd love to see these homeless management information systems...maybe they have stats on individual homeless similar to character attributes in a role playing game:
Name: Skeeter McShittlesType: Schizophrenic
Class: Crackhead
Laziness: 8 Alcoholism: 5 Craziness: 7
Special Powers: If bitten by Skeeter McShittles, victim has a 50% chance of contracting a staph infection.
According to the report, the chronically homeless population in what HUD calls the Los Angeles city and county "continuum of care" -- which excludes Glendale, Long Beach and Pasadena but includes the rest of the county -- has decreased by more than 35% over two years, from nearly 34,900 to about 22,400. The total number of homeless decreased from about 83,300 to about 68,600, the report found.
Wow, that is great news for California! You know what would be even better? An Extinction Level Event for only homeless people, obviously.
Wikipedia says: "Dodo" is also often used as a term to describe an unintelligent or deranged person". Skeeter McShittles is a dodo.
Photo source: http://www.wordinfo.info
1 comments:
LMAO WTF?! I wish we all had video game stats floating around our heads. Mine would say "loves cupcakes; can drop kick you in the face in 2.5 seconds".
Post a Comment